Opportunity to Learn
Yes. That's what I said. So, what are these so called benefits? First, you need to look at these failing moments/experiences as learning opportunities. Yep, an opportunity to learn.
Learn what? You're probably asking yourself. What in the world is this chick talking about.
Failure is putting yourself out in the unknown. Taking the chance/opportunity to fail or succeed. If you never put yourself out there you will never know what outcome you'll have.
So what if you fail. Stop avoiding the chance of failure. This "fail time" is when you learn, especially about yourself. Are you putting enough of yourself into what your are trying to accomplish? This can be applied to anything. Your family, friendships, career, new career, health, and especially yourself.
How you decide to think about failure when you don't meet your expectations is either going to encourage or discourage you. When you don't meet your expectations don't let it mean something.....example: I'm not any good at this......why did I even think I could do it. Big Fat. Fail.
Ok, ladies! Here it is. So the "F" what! You failed. News flash here....So has a bazillion other people. The difference is confidence. Confidence is results of your ability to fail. Confidence allows you to be back at the drawing board to see where you need to tweak things. And then....yep, you guessed it. Give it another shot.
Stop it Already
Stop avoiding failure. You're avoiding something you're in charge of. You are in charge of your thoughts which is a nice place to keep clean and free of trash talk. If you don't support or respect what your goals are and what your action plan is how in the heck are you ever going to get support and respect from others. Be confident, proud, excited....even to the point of giddy (my favorite place to see people), and most importantly respect and love yourself.
- I'm confused
- I don't understand
- I'm undecided
- I'm a failure
- Not the right time
- I can't
- ....blah, blah, blah
No More Trash Thoughts
Figure your shit out. Decide. Take action. Check your goals. No. More. Trash. Thoughts.
Write down those trash thoughts, get them out of your head and get them on paper. Read through them and figure out where these thoughts are coming from.
Ponder and I mean really ponder these words and where they are coming from. Spend some time here. Do not go any further until you have done this. Except them and be done with them. Don't waste another precious moment on them. They are no good to you.
Now replace every single one of the trash thoughts with positive productive thoughts. Here's some examples:
- I can do this
- I am enough
- I am good enough....in fact I'm great
- I am able
- I am smart enough
- The right time is now
- I'll figure it out
- This will work
- People need it/want it
- ....you get the point
Read them out loud. Repeat. Repeat as many times as you like. Tape your list where you can see it...especially when those nasty ole trash thoughts come knocking on your door.
Take a deep belly rising breath, hold, then exhale deeply and noisily through your mouth. Repeat two more times. Now, don't you feel so much better. Smile. You got this.